About 27 years ago, I made a decision to leave a large, prestigious law firm where I represented several very large corporate clients to open my own law firm. I was motivated not only by the idea of becoming the master of my own fate by becoming self-employed, I wanted to practice the kind of law that would make a difference in the lives and fortunes of the people and the small to medium sized businesses that I represented.
I admit that there have been times when I thought that I regretted that decision, especially when my bank account was on life support. Nevertheless, I am satisfied with the decision that I made.
Being self-employed in a professional practice has taught me more about personal responsibility than I ever could have learned otherwise. The first hard lesson about personal responsibility was learned when I woke up one morning shortly after I had resigned my position at my previous employer and realized that I was facing a substantial debt and could no longer count on a substantial paycheck like the one that I had been receiving from my employer.
If I was to feed my family and to pay my bills, it was up to me to find clients who would pay me for my time and professional services. At times the learning curve was steep, but necessity forced me to learn about marketing my legal services, which was required in order to attract my clients. And I was driven by necessity to achieve results that my clients expected.
By most accounts, it can be said that I have managed to build a substantial and successful law practice over the past 27 years. Whatever success I have achieved was possible only because I realized from the beginning that it was up to me and me alone to do what was required to succeed.
About a year ago, I was diagnosed with diabetes, and my physician informed me that I needed to adjust my lifestyle and diet. My doctor could tell me what I needed to do, but it was up to me to do it. During the past year, the lifestyle and diet changes that I made have resulted in the loss of 60 to 70 pounds, and my latest laboratory tests indicate that my diabetes is well under control
Space does not permit me to recite the many failures that I have experienced during the past three decades, but for each failure a valuable lesson was learned. And more importantly, those lessons could not have been learned if I had refused to accept personal responsibility for those failures.
Whether facing economic difficulties or relationship problems, each of us can achieve our goals by recognizing that we are personally responsible for how we react and respond to life's challenges. We cannot always control what happens to us, but we alone are responsible for how we deal with the events of our lives. Recognizing our personal responsibility is the first step toward acquiring the courage and skill necessary to create happy and productive lives for ourselves.
It's up to you. It's up to me. It's a matter of personal responsibility.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Monday, January 16, 2012
Better Late Than Never
I never have been the "first on my block" to find out about or to do anything. And being naturally independent and rebellious, I seldom was one for jumping onto anybody's bandwagon, if for no other reason than to avoid being called a "Johnny-come-lately".
But there are certain fads and trends that I simply have been unable to side-step, foremost among them during my lifetime has been the personal computer and the Internet.
When I began my journalism career, I wrote news stories on an old-fashioned Royal typewriter. When my newspaper employer entered the electronic age and installed IBM Selectric typewriters, I purchased my old Royal for $25.00. I still have it (almost 40 years later), and it is still in good working condition. I had begun my legal career before my newspaper moved to the next level of technology by installing word processing.
At the dawn of my legal career, lawyers conducted legal research among the thousands of volumes of books and treatises in a law library, which at most firms required a full-time law librarian just to keep the constant supply of supplemental material current. Now, legal research is performed online, and many more resources are available from online legal libraries than what ever could have been maintained in even the most extensive traditional law library.
In addition, our legal secretaries were required to type our pleadings, correspondence and other documents on electric typewriters, some of which were equipped with "mag-cards" for those documents with established templates requiring only that the blanks be filled in. After a couple of years, the firm where I was employed as a young associate purchased word processors, and from that point the days of carbon paper and clicking typewriters going at 120+ words per minute were numbered.
In 1985, when I first opened my own law practice, I purchased my first computer (for almost $7,000.00), to be used exclusively by my secretary for word processing purposes, because word processing was about the only function that the computer had and certainly was the only function anyone in my office knew how to access and operate.
By the late 1980s, personal computers became more affordable, and the Internet began to gain some traction. A couple of young men, Bill Gates and Steve Jobs, had begun development of software programs and operating systems that ultimately would make cyberspace and computer operations available to everyone - even me.
Fast-forwarding to 2012, I can say only that the past 30 years have been a technological whirlwind. Internet advertising and marketing have moved to the forefront for nearly every service industry in the country. Social media sites are beginning to play a huge role in the marketing of goods and services. The development of IP services able to transmit voice and image, such as Skype, have brought distant friends and family closer together. Thanks to this technology, I don't have to wait months (or sometimes years) before seeing two of my grandchildren who currently are residing in Korea and who will be moving to Eastern Europe this summer.
But the technological revolution has had a darker side, as well. New crimes, scams and other fraudulent activities have found a home on the Internet. Identity theft has become a major problem, and an entirely new industry has been developed to provide protection against it.
My wife is fond of saying that I was dragged into the 20th century kicking and screaming, but not before the beginning of the 21st century. I am just now getting used to the 20th century, but I hope to see you all soon in the 21st century.
Beam me up, Scotty.
But there are certain fads and trends that I simply have been unable to side-step, foremost among them during my lifetime has been the personal computer and the Internet.
When I began my journalism career, I wrote news stories on an old-fashioned Royal typewriter. When my newspaper employer entered the electronic age and installed IBM Selectric typewriters, I purchased my old Royal for $25.00. I still have it (almost 40 years later), and it is still in good working condition. I had begun my legal career before my newspaper moved to the next level of technology by installing word processing.
At the dawn of my legal career, lawyers conducted legal research among the thousands of volumes of books and treatises in a law library, which at most firms required a full-time law librarian just to keep the constant supply of supplemental material current. Now, legal research is performed online, and many more resources are available from online legal libraries than what ever could have been maintained in even the most extensive traditional law library.
In addition, our legal secretaries were required to type our pleadings, correspondence and other documents on electric typewriters, some of which were equipped with "mag-cards" for those documents with established templates requiring only that the blanks be filled in. After a couple of years, the firm where I was employed as a young associate purchased word processors, and from that point the days of carbon paper and clicking typewriters going at 120+ words per minute were numbered.
In 1985, when I first opened my own law practice, I purchased my first computer (for almost $7,000.00), to be used exclusively by my secretary for word processing purposes, because word processing was about the only function that the computer had and certainly was the only function anyone in my office knew how to access and operate.
By the late 1980s, personal computers became more affordable, and the Internet began to gain some traction. A couple of young men, Bill Gates and Steve Jobs, had begun development of software programs and operating systems that ultimately would make cyberspace and computer operations available to everyone - even me.
Fast-forwarding to 2012, I can say only that the past 30 years have been a technological whirlwind. Internet advertising and marketing have moved to the forefront for nearly every service industry in the country. Social media sites are beginning to play a huge role in the marketing of goods and services. The development of IP services able to transmit voice and image, such as Skype, have brought distant friends and family closer together. Thanks to this technology, I don't have to wait months (or sometimes years) before seeing two of my grandchildren who currently are residing in Korea and who will be moving to Eastern Europe this summer.
But the technological revolution has had a darker side, as well. New crimes, scams and other fraudulent activities have found a home on the Internet. Identity theft has become a major problem, and an entirely new industry has been developed to provide protection against it.
My wife is fond of saying that I was dragged into the 20th century kicking and screaming, but not before the beginning of the 21st century. I am just now getting used to the 20th century, but I hope to see you all soon in the 21st century.
Beam me up, Scotty.
Friday, January 13, 2012
More Than Just a Name
I have been known by many names.
My wife and step-daughter call me "Bear", probably because of my ability to grow a lot of hair everywhere except on my head. My daughters call me "Daddy". My golfing buddies call me "The Weave". My brothers call me "Bub" or "Bubba", and my mother calls me "Son". Some of my social and business friends call me "R. David", while others call me simply "David". Most of my clients refer to me as either "Mr. Weaver" or "Attorney Weaver", and in a couple of cases, "Dr. Weaver" (after all, most lawyers do hold doctoral degrees, although we seldom use the title).
But the widest variety of names by which I have been called has originated with my grandchildren. I remember that before my grandson was born almost 14 years ago, I gave considerable thought to how I would like for him to refer to me. Having never arrived at a final decision, I simply allowed him to call me whatever he chose to call me, and I have followed that tradition with all of my grandchildren who came after him. As a result, I have been known by names ranging from "Pop-Paw" to "BamPaw" to "Gamp-Paw" to "Grandpa".
Coming from the mouths of my grandchildren, the words are music to my ears, regardless of the name by which they call me.
The name by which others refer to us is one of the most important ingredients of what constitutes our own self-image. Hence, when we engage in "name-calling" of our enemies or opponents, we are engaging in a form of combat designed to injure that person's image of himself.
Our names are of critical importance to us. Being a former journalist, I learned firsthand how folks react when their names are misspelled in public media. It is an old saying and an axiom among publicist: "Say what you may about me, but be sure to spell my name correctly."
Moreover, a good name logically suggests a good reputation. History is replete with examples of those who have gone to great lengths to protect or restore their good names (and, hence, their reputations).
Clearly, a name is more than a label. The names by which we are known say much about who we are, what we do and the relationships we have with our fellows. And although we all are a single person, the names we are called reflect that we are people of many characteristics, traits, relationships and abilities.
My wife and step-daughter call me "Bear", probably because of my ability to grow a lot of hair everywhere except on my head. My daughters call me "Daddy". My golfing buddies call me "The Weave". My brothers call me "Bub" or "Bubba", and my mother calls me "Son". Some of my social and business friends call me "R. David", while others call me simply "David". Most of my clients refer to me as either "Mr. Weaver" or "Attorney Weaver", and in a couple of cases, "Dr. Weaver" (after all, most lawyers do hold doctoral degrees, although we seldom use the title).
But the widest variety of names by which I have been called has originated with my grandchildren. I remember that before my grandson was born almost 14 years ago, I gave considerable thought to how I would like for him to refer to me. Having never arrived at a final decision, I simply allowed him to call me whatever he chose to call me, and I have followed that tradition with all of my grandchildren who came after him. As a result, I have been known by names ranging from "Pop-Paw" to "BamPaw" to "Gamp-Paw" to "Grandpa".
Coming from the mouths of my grandchildren, the words are music to my ears, regardless of the name by which they call me.
The name by which others refer to us is one of the most important ingredients of what constitutes our own self-image. Hence, when we engage in "name-calling" of our enemies or opponents, we are engaging in a form of combat designed to injure that person's image of himself.
Our names are of critical importance to us. Being a former journalist, I learned firsthand how folks react when their names are misspelled in public media. It is an old saying and an axiom among publicist: "Say what you may about me, but be sure to spell my name correctly."
Moreover, a good name logically suggests a good reputation. History is replete with examples of those who have gone to great lengths to protect or restore their good names (and, hence, their reputations).
Clearly, a name is more than a label. The names by which we are known say much about who we are, what we do and the relationships we have with our fellows. And although we all are a single person, the names we are called reflect that we are people of many characteristics, traits, relationships and abilities.
Monday, January 2, 2012
Happy New Year - One Day at a Time
Ah, the New Year. It's that arbitrarily selected day on the calendar when we all feel like we are getting a fresh start. A time when we can put the past behind us and begin anew, hoping to avoid the mistakes of the previous 12 months by resolving to do better. But the problem with New Year's resolutions is that they require us to change our behaviors in order to accomplish those things we have resolved to accomplish. And researchers tell us that up to 90 percent of the resolutions we make on New Year's Day have been abandoned before the end of January.
What if every day was New Year's Day? What if, every time we wake up in the morning, we can have the sensation of a new beginning that the new day brings that encourages us to learn from the previous day's mistakes, put them behind us and then resolve not to repeat them just for the day ahead?
As a poker player, most of the serious mistakes I have seen made by players (and at times have made, myself) occur when a player who has been losing tries to "get even". This impulse will cause a player to make unprofitable decisions, usually resulting in increasing his losses and resulting in still poorer play in later hands. One of the world's best poker players once provided me with a valuable suggestion to avoid falling victim to this downward spiral. He said, "Remember, you are even at the beginning of each hand that is dealt. Every hand is a new game, and what happened before that is history."
The same can be said in every area of my life, whether professional, personal or financial. Although there certainly are consequences that must be faced and endured as a result of my mistakes, those consequences and the mistakes of the past that led to them do not have to negatively affect the way in which I conduct myself today.
If I have a New Year's resolution to make, it is that I resolve to treat every new day as if it is New Year's Day. I will try to learn from my past mistakes, and more importantly, I will try to remember that if I continue to do what I always have done, I will get what I always have gotten. And if I want to achieve a different result (whether it's losing weight, acquiring more wealth, becoming a better person, etc.), I cannot succeed unless I do something different. With the beginning of each day, I have a chance to try something new in order to achieve what I want to achieve.
With that in mind, I wish all of you a very happy and prosperous New Year, and more to the point, have a Happy New Day!
What if every day was New Year's Day? What if, every time we wake up in the morning, we can have the sensation of a new beginning that the new day brings that encourages us to learn from the previous day's mistakes, put them behind us and then resolve not to repeat them just for the day ahead?
As a poker player, most of the serious mistakes I have seen made by players (and at times have made, myself) occur when a player who has been losing tries to "get even". This impulse will cause a player to make unprofitable decisions, usually resulting in increasing his losses and resulting in still poorer play in later hands. One of the world's best poker players once provided me with a valuable suggestion to avoid falling victim to this downward spiral. He said, "Remember, you are even at the beginning of each hand that is dealt. Every hand is a new game, and what happened before that is history."
The same can be said in every area of my life, whether professional, personal or financial. Although there certainly are consequences that must be faced and endured as a result of my mistakes, those consequences and the mistakes of the past that led to them do not have to negatively affect the way in which I conduct myself today.
If I have a New Year's resolution to make, it is that I resolve to treat every new day as if it is New Year's Day. I will try to learn from my past mistakes, and more importantly, I will try to remember that if I continue to do what I always have done, I will get what I always have gotten. And if I want to achieve a different result (whether it's losing weight, acquiring more wealth, becoming a better person, etc.), I cannot succeed unless I do something different. With the beginning of each day, I have a chance to try something new in order to achieve what I want to achieve.
With that in mind, I wish all of you a very happy and prosperous New Year, and more to the point, have a Happy New Day!
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